Bryce,
Today you turned 20! I just can't believe it, how did you grow up so fast? You have been on your mission (6 days short of) a year, so this is a pretty amazing week! Each month on the 19th, I wake up and go over to our month countdown blocks and turn the number back. Each Monday, my alarm goes off at 5:55 a.m. and I roll over to check my phone for an email from you. Each day I'm in the kitchen, I look at your photo on our counter-top.
A friend called today, to ask how I was (knowing it was your birthday) and I answered "just fine, I'm doing fine", and that was an honest answer! I was fine and I am fine, cause I know you are fine, more than fine- you are amazing, thriving and thrilled to be on your mission. I will admit over the past year we talk about you every single day, it's like you are still here. We always say things like "wouldn't Bryce love this" or "remember when Bryce did..." or "I wonder what Bryce would do/think". You are in our constant thoughts and in our every prayer. But we are all very positive and excited and just simply miss your company.
For the first 3 days after you had left on your mission, I cried... a lot. It was like you had left, forever. Coming home from the airport was really hard. I didn't want to talk to anyone, in fact I didn't answer the phone. It didn't help that I had to wash your clothing, unmake your bed and put away your computer etc. But after a few days, that peace came back (or perhaps never left). I knew you were right where your Heavenly Father wanted you to be, and I knew you were going to be OK, in-fact, I never doubted it, not even for a second. I in all honesty was so grateful for such an amazing son who would be willing to make such a sacrifice. I often wondered if I would be willing to do such a thing. I felt so grateful for what an example and loving brother you have been to your little brothers, you are larger than life to all of them, they really look up to you.
I haven't cried since those first three days... until tonight. We made a cake in your honor,(Cameron tried to get us to take everyone out to dinner in your honor as well, ha ha-nice try Cameron). The kids were so excited to find African animals and decorate your cake. We all stood around the counter and sang to you, we sang Happy Birthday and half way through the song, I lost it. I must admit I'm struggling right now, but know that tomorrow when I wake up, I'll be fine again. The truth is, I am so happy!
I am happy to be your mother, I'm happy for all I've learned being your mother and for our family. I am happy for the exciting changes that lie ahead in your future. I share joy in your success on your mission and am so proud of your growth. You've encouraged us all to try a little harder and I've seen the blessings from it, especially in your brothers.
So, happy birthday son, it certainly will be a memorable one, the people of Africa are lucky to have you.
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